How to be a GREAT patient

 We spend quite a bit of time searching out quality doctors.  We ask friends and other providers for referrals. We check ratings on line etc.

No matter how GREAT A doctor is, it is OUR responsibility to be a great patient. I have assembled outstanding doctors and been a terrible patient. When I was a terrible patient, I didn't get the outstanding care that my doctors typically deliver.

Before my AS inflammation was under control I was in crippling pain.  Emotionally I was a mess. My pain was out of control, I was exhausted from the pain and had lost hope that the medications would actually work.  My mother had recently passed away and my heart. was broken.  

I sat in the chair with my rheumatologist. Tears streaming down my face. She looked at me, my chart and pretty much walked out of the room. My blood work didn't give her an indication that things needed to be changed and I was not in an emotional state to be open to any conversation.  I was shocked when she did that.  It was eye opener example one.

The second example of being a terrible patient was when I was in front of my back surgeon.  Just about a year prior he did my first lumbar fusion.  I found myself in an incredible amount of pain again. I was pretty sure the pain I was experiencing was going to send me back to surgery.

As he was reviewing the CT scan, he proposed an aggressive 2 day surgery. Day one they fuse from the front, day 2 fusion from the back.  I must have gone ashen white at the thought of this surgery.  Because I didn't immediately sign up for this surgery he too walked out of the room.  I made a follow up appointment about a month later because I had a few questions.  As we sat and chatted about the surgery, I am not sure what I said or did,  but once again my surgeon said, "You aren't ready." And he walked out again.  I asked his assistant, "Now what?"  The assistant said, "Make a follow up for late June" 

Now, I know that from appointment to surgery takes about a month. I was MORE than ready for this surgery.  I had learned how to play the game.

I called and moved my appointment to the first week of May. Why? Because I'm a teacher. If I'm going to have maximum time for recovery I know I need my surgery to be early June. 

I arrived for my early May appointment. Took huge deep breaths before he walked in.  Despite my pain being at a pretty constant 8 I didn't show any emotion.

When asked "How are you doing?"  My response was: "I no longer go to the grocery store because it's too painful.  I can barely make it through 15 minutes of standing and the other day I had to flee the mall with my teenage daughter because I couldn't walk any more".  

He responded: "You are ready".  

Doctors have 15 minute time blocks.  We all know that often 15 minutes per patient just isn't enough time. I have found that when I walk in with 3 statements that summarize exactly how I am doing my docs respond really well to the succinct , factual statements.

Since taking this non emotional factual approach, I haven't had a doc walk out on me again! They have even included me in treatment conversation and asked ME questions about my thoughts on medications etc.  

While patients need our docs to be at their absolute best when we are at our worst, we have to remember they are people too.  They can't treat you when you are emotionally unavailable to their treatment.